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Month: May 2015

Strength of a Woman

 

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Here are the new promotional cards for events.  I like them a lot, they came out better than I expected, but it is a strange feeling to see your image so boldly displayed.  I have always tended to shy away from photos, history has proven that I don’t know the “right selfie” pose to do myself justice.  I tend to be the one slouched in the group, or laughing too big,  or even with eyes closed.  I can distinctly remember two grade school years where my school ID had closed eyes.  My picture history guarantees that you will see just my head in the back of a group shot in order to avoid embarrassment , now I have a logo, a brand, not only of my name but my name in my self image.  I couldn’t say No, because I thought the concept was so cool, and I really am trying to gain that self confidence that lies within all of us.  We all have it, but often we fake the appearance of being independent and confident, maybe even needing a new selfie to gather admiration and a false sense of approval.  With social media, there are not as many “hidden family secrets,” and we put our lives completely on display, sometimes unknowingly or unwilling.  I may shy away from pictures, but I have also never been one to change my image, or completely filter pictures that would be used, simply because I believe “what you see, is what you get.”  I am more afraid of someone judging a pretty picture and being disappointed in person, but for me that goes beyond physical looks, and more of my character.  I need recognition and positive reinforcement for a job well done.  I always have, and it may be because I am an Only Child.  I feel unsatisfied in a project without a pat on the head and I don’t want to be that person.  We need to be appreciated, acknowledged for our good deeds, but knowing our self worth is a treasure worth more than words.  I think this is especially true for women.  So often, I hear that they don’t feel valued.  That they may as well be the maid, or a piece of furniture in their home.  Women do so many things for so many people that make not just households run, but communities, cities, states, the world.  Yes, this is true.  If women (mothers, sisters, aunts, girlfriends, wives) did not take care or teach men, children, other women, how to cook, wash, launder, give that sensitive maternal instinct that we, people, need than the world would not function as well as it does.  This is a weight that women bare, and we wouldn’t know how to stop if we wanted to.  This weight equals strength that is immeasurable and by such, proves that our worth is just as incomprehensible.  So, although this post may be controversial to some, I am sticking with it tonight, and say being a Woman truly Rocks!

 

 

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Memorial Day

My Birthday is on November 11th, so maybe that is why I have always known the difference between Veteran’s Day and Memorial Day.  My extremely patriotic mother was proud that I was born on an Air Force Base to an Active Duty Military Father and Veteran Mother, and even more so when I followed in their footsteps, serving one term on Active Duty in the United States Air Force, too.  My mother never let me mistake that Veteran’s Day was to recognize all that have served past or present and Memorial Day is to honor those that have served and fallen for this great nation.  To remember their sacrifice and that of their family that loves and misses them everyday so that we may enjoy our freedom with our loved ones.  This lesson was never lost on me and I have made sure to teach my children the difference, unfortunately I have realized that a lot of people have not been taught as I was and today say Happy Memorial Day, or Thank a Veteran for their service.  What is one to do in this situation?  I can write and post that this is not the appropriate response on this day, but do not want to insult the person that was never taught differently.  I guess my goal with this post is to spread the word, as I did with an article on my facebook wall, and hope that the more people I reach will continue to share so we can educate the world one person at a time!  I am sharing a link with a video that will put it all into perspective, a beautiful reminder of the dedication of our fallen heroes and the respect and gratitude we owe them, not just today, but every day of our lives!

http://www.littlethings.com/saluting-marine-rolling-thunder/

 

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McFarland USA – Fresno

I don’t like silence while I am working, put it down to having a house full of little boys, I think better among the chaos.  This being said, I tend to throw on a movie while writing, working, or even thinking and this is often how I catch up on the new releases.  The other night I watched McFarland USA and I loved it, of course, I enjoy most Kevin Costner movies, but this movie had all the action, comedy, drama, to keep me entertained throughout the whole thing.  I was surprised that there was not more of a buzz about this movie, either people haven’t taken the time to watch it or our world has become so “Hollywood” that we have lost the heart of America.  I don’t follow the Kardashian’s or Bruce Jenner, but because of social media, I know more about them than I care to admit.  Yet this movie about small town America and boys that worked hard to achieve and make a difference in their communities has fallen by the wayside.  However, I know that this is just the way things are nowadays and not really the point of my post today, what made me want to comment was that I cannot believe there was no Fresno love for this movie!!  The movie itself, involves the Central Valley, but two of the young men from the movie graduated and went on to Fresno State, yet still no mention across facebook or twitter about that simple fact.  I have lived around the world and Fresno is one of the proudest cities I know, but no love for a heartwarming, family oriented, rise from the ashes movie that not only put McFarland on the map, but acknowledges the higher education and successful athletic department of Fresno State University.  Let’s give credit to the underdogs, support the community, and make our hometown famous for the good, not the negative statistics that most people associate with Fresno.

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Promoting and Marketing

I can only hope that maybe you have missed me but I haven’t been far, this is a picture of us (my illustrator, Gabriel and I) with Aisha, a wonderful marketing director at a strategy meeting.  Three minds are better than one as we came up with ideas for promoting and energizing each other for the hard work ahead.  I have to say it was productive as we have two dates and locations in the works for the book launch/signing and meet the author events.  Also hope to announce a few brick and mortar locations that you will be able to buy the book in the near future.  Thank you again for following and although I haven’t posted I have been writing, as always, words from my heart, mind, and soul!!

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Actions

received_1000189973379479We have all been taught that ‘Actions have Consequences’ and that has certainly proven true in my life.  Most of the time these are negative, due to lack of consideration on my part and not thinking ahead of how my action may reflect on to another person.  But, some times those consequences turn in to positives by creating a learning lesson.  For example, my son chose not to do his homework and was forced to go to homework detention.  He knew that his action would cause that end result, and apparently was willing to accept that consequence.  What he didn’t know, was that I would refuse to pick him up and he would have to take the late bus home.  My response to the situation changed his behavior as he now knows that I won’t readjust my schedule for his bad action.  If we take action to remove negative actions that oppose our sense of well being we will be happier in our lives and able to continue with daily activities with positive and productive results.  Take Action, Take Notice, Find your Inner Worth!

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The Girl behind the Words

This blog began with a biographical post titled Who is Brooke, but it is a generic gathering of words.  It certainly does not get to the heart of who I am, and I strongly believe that when you know an author that you have a deeper understanding of their words and the meaning behind them.  I write with a purpose, or at least I try to, I hope that my words unite people either because they relate to what I am saying, or simply because it is a funny tale that brings a smile to their face.  I know that I haven’t written a post on this blog to make you laugh yet, but my daily interactions with these four boys could give me a lifetime of fodder by just relating the anecdotes of being their mother.  Yesterday was the tenth birthday of my second son, and it was a full day of me running behind, chasing my tail.  Presents to wrap, Balloons to inflate, Decorations to put up, and a trip to the store to buy a cake and cookies for his class.  As I went through the grocery store line, I must have presented that harried image because the clerk asked how I was with an actual concerned tone, that made me answer with the truth, “I am rushed as it is my son’s birthday and I need to get these cookies to the school before his class ends.”  She looked up at me, and said, “At least you aren’t having to bake too.”  It was salt on an open wound, because I was already dealing with the “guilty mom heart” of how I wished that I could bake a cake worthy of his birthday.  I am a decent cook, but baking is not my forte.  I was also feeling bad that I wasn’t delivering cupcakes but cookies to his class, but with 36 kids to feed, cookies were a better option.  The day continued without further incident, and my little one was happy as he thanked me for his birthday and said it was a great day.  I laid in bed that night thinking over the events of the afternoon, and realized that I made everything a bigger deal in my mind than it needed to be, which we tend to do as women.  Gabriel didn’t care about his cake, as long as he had one.  He would have been happy even if I did bake a cake, that was frosted atop the 9×11 pan, and the cookies were a hit, probably because they weren’t the stereotypical cupcakes.  As mother’s, and people, in general, we need to give ourselves a break, and not make things so complicated; and that is the Girl behind the Words.  I stress, over think, run late, can’t bake, or cook from a box, but I can cook a meal with 20 ingredients from a cookbook, and then wonder why my kids ask for pizza.  I take the road less traveled, but I am learning to be proud of it and am actually starting to really enjoy the adventure.  If nothing else, I will have a story to tell when sitting in a retirement home wondering when my boys will come to visit.

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Love & Loss

Today is the two year anniversary of my mother’s passing and I have debated all day about posting or what to post.  I didn’t want to write and share only words of sadness.  It was then that it occurred to me that every one has a tale of woe, some much worse or sadder than others, but that is what connects us all as people.  I thought about the response that I received on my Mother’s Day Tribute blog and realized that is where my voice is, what gives me the strength to write from my heart, mind, and soul.  I share, and hope that people identify with what it is that I have to say and maybe it will bring joy or solace to those that read it.  So, with that being said, I found a piece of myself today and may not be nearly as lost in my loneliness as I assume, because we all have loved or lost in some form, some way, at sometime.  I have posted before on my mother’s page that ‘I’m not trying to learn how not to miss you, I’m trying to learn how to live life while missing you’ and that has become a mantra for my life that I would like to give to others dealing with how to move on.  I cannot go a day without something reminding me of my mother and I am okay with that because the things that drove me the most crazy about her are the things that I miss today.  She instilled greatness in me by all the good works she did, and although she set the bar high with her expectations, I will live up to her standard, knowing in all that I do, I follow in her footsteps, hoping that when my time on this earth is done, that I too, leave a legacy for others to follow or learn from.

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Social Media

In this process of marketing myself so that I can promote my book, I have gone back to the platforms of social media sites long forgotten to breathe new life into updated profiles.  This brings me to ask; What are your favorite, can’t live without, social media sites?  What are the sites that you don’t care about anymore or haven’t even attempted to use?  I can say that there are sites out here that I did not even know existed and I thought myself savvy on at least being “in the know” even if I never tried it.  I know that people tend to use various sites for different reasons, or to connect with different genres, but when are we “too plugged in?”  It is true that with the push of a button you can now post once and connect to multitude of sites simultaneously but to not be viewed as just a poster, never connecting to your followers, it is important to visit the site and read, comment, like, and share.  All of this takes time.  Time that we are not interacting with the real world, with people right in front of us everyday, the little people that see us, hear their stories while typing or reading at our laptops or phones.  I used to be very guilty of this, especially when I was going to school and doing homework.  I am better now, but know that it still happens more often than not, and I know it happens to many of you too.  So today I challenge each of you to take a moment and turn away from the screen and don’t just hear the person in front of you talking, but truly listen to them.  Look at their facial expression as they speak, and if it is one of those little people, see the smile in their eyes as they know you really see them.  Then tell me about it, as you share your favorite or least favorite social media site! Be it #facebook #google+ #instagram #twitter

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The Road Less Traveled

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We spend our days complaining about how difficult our lives are and why it is that we always take the path less traveled.  It is because without complications to overcome, we do not appreciate the blessings in our life.  We need that sense of accomplishment, but is it because we don’t feel that we deserve for good things to happen to us, if we didn’t earn them?  I would like to think that isn’t the case, but as I have contemplated why I make things so difficult for myself, I believe it is because deep down, I need to feel that I worked hard for the good things in my life.  I don’t want to say anything was ever handed to me, we have an infinity for the underdog, those that have come from the bottom up.  Is it a matter of respect?  Is that fair?  Just because you come from “nothing,” that makes you more deserving for the amenities life has to offer?  That is absolutely not true, because somewhere along the way, someone in that family did work hard for the blessing and benefits.  This occurred to me as I was teaching the boys that they needed to work harder if they wanted a reward.  This could be allowance, dessert, a trip to the park.  The chores need to be done, good grades on homework, ect.  I won’t stop telling them this, because that is just the way life works, but does this mean that I am also instilling this belief that they will need to take the harder path because that will make them more deserving of life’s blessings?  My hope is that they learn the meaning of hard work, and that they won’t shy away from a complicated situation but that I will also one day be accomplished enough to give them things that I haven’t been able to over the years.  I do not want for them to feel that those things are less worthy simply because they feel that they weren’t earned.  However, with all that being said, I do think that the road less traveled, takes us on adventures that bring meaning to our life.  Challenges us in ways that keep us constantly moving forward and striving for bigger and better.

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A Late Mother’s Day Tribute

Yesterday was Mother’s Day, and it was the second year without my mom, and the third I spent as a single mother.  It was a day I think that I always took for granted before my life turned upside down because now I see this day in a completely different light.  There was no mother’s day brunch for me, no breakfast in bed, or fancy dinner, but there was laundry, cat litter, and a multitude of left overs to choose from.  I am not too proud to say that I did have myself a pity party as I saw the social media posts of people spending time with their mother and then home to the loving arms of their husband and children that spoiled these deserving mothers with gratitude and appreciation.  However, today I can say that I know I was not the only one to have these feelings yesterday and they are not wrong or right, but simply what is…..  Being a mother is one of the best jobs ever, but also one of the most thankless and that is okay, because one day my little boys will be grown men and will remember the sacrifices that I made.  I hope that the time, energy, love, and support I provide them with, strengthen their characters into men that know the meaning of self sacrifice and commitment.  Mother’s Day was about all who are emotionally invested in another human being, nurturing them on this miraculous journey we call life.  Single Fathers, Single Mothers, Birth Parents, Adoptive Parents, Teachers, Friends, Relatives, all can take on the mothering role that some may not have experienced until they were adults.  Life is not fair, and as I missed my mother because her presence is no longer on earth, others missed a mother that they may never have known.  It is a celebration of dedication and commitment to the well being of another person.  Happy Mother’s Day to one and all!

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