“Our truest life is when we are in dreams… Awake.”
I heard this quote by Henry David Thoreau just the other day and couldn’t help but ponder on how brilliant a statement it was and wonder why we, society, fail to realize how truly “good” life really is. We are headed into the New Year of 2018, so like most I am reflective as well as focused on the future. I would like to say that this year has been unusual for me, but I tend to live my life on the road less traveled; however, I can admit that this was an unexpected Christmas. I was not focused on the holiday because my boys were going to be with their father this year, until 3 days before Christmas and plans changed. I was rushing around like a crazy lady, trying to create Christmas Magic in our home to give a memory to remember. What I failed to realize was that I was so focused on the commercial aspect that I didn’t stop to give real meaning to the day. Please don’t misunderstand, I only gave the boys two gifts each and the continual reminder of why we celebrate Christmas, but as a mother, in not planning on them being here with me, I felt stressed and uneasy on not being prepared. (It’s a Mommy thing) Christmas came and went, the boys seemed to be grateful and happy.
The feelings for me have carried over as we prepare to celebrate the upcoming New Year. Always a difficult time of the year because my cousin, Sarah, passed on that witching hour, what I have come to realize was 5 years ago. She holds a special place in my heart as my first girl cousin, and we had recently began to reconnect as I made plans to move back to Fresno that same year. She was too young, too beautiful, and her children are only raised by the great memories we share so that they may know and remember their mother. Then I think on my mother that passed a short year later and how I was blessed with having her for my entire childhood. This weighs heavy on my heart and then I read through social media to find friends suffering the same burdens. Many are grieving for past loved ones, some fresh and new. The hands of time do not stop for the holidays, life is an unexpected blessing and we need to cherish it as such.
This brings me back to the quote. Our Truest Life…. I love that word True. What is it that makes or gives you, your truest life? For me it would be Love. I fail in so many ways every day, but as long as I can put my sons to bed knowing that they feel secure in my love, then I feel accomplished. Certainly, I want to provide more for them; to Live our Dream, Awake, but until that day, I need to learn to Cherish Every Moment. To quit focusing on the details, to see that every minute I spend stressing the small stuff, they are growing older and days are passing me by.
With this New Year, I want to make a Resolution or an Affirmation, that I will See the Bigger Picture, Focus on the Dream, but take Time in the Moments! If I only live for a brighter future, I may miss the journey it took to get there and that is really where the greatness lies. For these boys, I am their world and for some reason, I never understood what a true blessing that is….. I always felt that this responsibility was often an overwhelming burden more then blessing. Some may read that and find me callous and shallow, but I also know that there are plenty of mothers for which that statement will ring true.
For 2018, I challenge each of us to take on our burdens and bare them as blessings. To achieve our dreams wide awake, so that each day may be joy unto itself. Take pleasure in all things, big or small, positive or negative….. because in this life the only thing certain is the uncertainty of each day. It can always be better or it can always be worse…. Essentially it is what you make it, so make it the best it can be!
