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2020 Seniors

Published by Autumn Brooke on March 17, 2020

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This world of ours is in such a crazy place right now that it is hard to plan not just for tomorrow, but even for several hours from now. That is how rapidly things are changing. I think about how I was overwhelmed with how much there was to do and schedule for my family of 7 that I had a huge wall calendar with all our events, plus my purse calendar. This doesn’t count the tasking app on my phone, or the list stuck to the fridge because we have a Senior that had 3 months of deadlines and activities given to us by the school.

He is my firstborn, I have been dreading this time of our life as much as I have been looking forward to it. My baby will graduate High School, the final stepping stone to adulthood.  He has earned it, more then deserves all the fun and excitement that these last few weeks would entail. However, that is not to be the case, as one dance has been canceled, most likely Senior Prom too, and the possibility of not walking for a graduation ceremony.  These activities are rites of passage, I have been talking with him about them since kindergarten. My heart breaks not only for him and all Seniors but for us parents as well. We Did It! We made it this far and deserve to see our babies enjoy these final days of their childhood.

For some, it will be the last time they may ever see their friends as most are headed off to different colleges, vocational schools, or even jobs. School had become a joyous place with special events, breakfasts, award assemblies, activities designed specifically for the Senior class. What happens to the yearbooks, the dated announcements already ordered, for a few around the world Prom was already canceled with clothes never worn. That first dance with a long-time crush never experienced.

I don’t understand, nor do I know how long all of this might last, but I do know that this generation of Seniors is different than my Senior Class. We did not have access to technology and understanding that makes all of you a different breed. A group of adults that will be able to not only fix what we have lost but make it better. We will need you as if you have needed us. I believe in you and our future knowing that you will be the generation of reform and rebuilding.

Class of 2020, you are not forgotten and our heart breaks with you, but at the end of all this chaos, you will be the ones that make the biggest impact!

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Selfie Syndrome

Published by Autumn Brooke on June 23, 2018

Remember these…..  this app was popular for a month as it would take your picture and convert your face into that of a Cover Model. Several of my friends and family used it to share what they “Could” look like, some even made it their social media profile pic for a while. I was curious and played around with it too, but didn’t post any of these. Yesterday was #NationalSelfieDay and I did take a selfie to post on my facebook page in order to make a point for today’s blog.

When I took the above images, I kept them because I had a thought about how focused many of us have become with our image. A desire to appear more than what we are in our physical appearance. I know that I am guilty of it, as proven in my selfie post yesterday. I took atleast half a dozen photos with different angles and lighting so that I would look more attractive. I did not use any filters such as IG, snapchat, or an editing tool, but I didn’t need to because there is a selfie softening filter automatically. I was actually unaware of this until it occurred to me that I always looked better when taking a selfie then if someone took a picture of me for an event.

The pictures in the app used above don’t make me feel more beautiful, they actually cause my self image to feel lower because I fear that I should be doing something different in order to achieve model status. I should learn better make up techniques, drink more water, have more facials…. maybe even think of using injections or sculpting.  This is not who I want to be or what I would want to promote to anyone who may look up to me. I do not ever want to be so vain that I would be willing to undergo a knife just to be “Socially Acceptable” in today’s day and age. To fit what the world as decided a middle aged women should look like.

I don’t let the world choose how I should live. I tend to lean towards the conservative, I am stricter than most in how I raise my children, I hold high morals and values that are certainly not popular in society, so why do I worry so much in how my physical appearance may be rated?

I guess in writing this, I realize that I don’t have an answer or solution so much, as it is just my observation. However, with realization, I can and will make an effort to change my thought process so that I may live easier. Be carefree enough to not avoid the camera, although I tend to be the one in the pictures with the closed eyes, or laughing too big. I want my children to know that it is okay to be themselves and not strive to be what only “some” consider perfect. I will still take Selfies, but I hope that now I may be happy with that First shot and not need to Filter every photo.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I know that I am made in “His Image” and in knowing that….  I know that I am Beautiful just being Me, and so are you!

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DesignProof – Digital Design Tournament

Published by Autumn Brooke on April 10, 2018

This week I had the opportunity to attend a competition between Graphic Designers. It was put on by DesignProof at Bitwise Industries. I must admit to being impressed from the moment I arrived. Met at the door by two students that are welcoming as they place a wristband if over 21 yrs, for “complimentary” beer, and ask if you are familiar with the facility. Being my first visit I was offered a tour to of Bitwise.  Walls are covered in an eye catching graffiti style, there is a cafe, meeting space, Fed Ex, a small shop to repair screens and offer accessories for digital needs. Arrays of outlets in various seating locations, to catch up on homework for the many classes offered on site. It is a great location with so much to offer. You can read more about them here, and you should… http://bitwiseindustries.com/story/.

There was so much to do, see, and read, but with only thirty minutes until the start of the competition, I was inclined to partake of the refreshments especially after learning that it was accompanied by a Polish Sausage wrapped in a homemade bun, with the most delicious fresh relish provided by Mabel’s kitchen, where everything is made fresh sweet or savory. I heard stories about their homemade cinnamon buns and triple chocolate brownies, so I know I will need to make another visit to experience their decadence.  Menu items, hours, and more can be found on their website…. http://mabelskitchenfresno.com/.

People watching, talking, sharing in food and drink, I was fully satisfied and happy that I had come out to experience a new locale that I must have driven passed too many times to count. I was then reminded that there was still more…. the competition… my reason for attending, free entertainment. With minutes to spare, I made my way to the theater for a good seat. Yes, there is a theater with stage, stadium seating, and screen within Bitwise. It just kept getting better and better, especially after being stopped on my way in by another student that invited me to play a game of Plinko.  Let a golf ball roll down a decline and if it lands in the middle lane, I may choose a prize. To my delight, I now had dessert too as I settled with ease into my seat and was introduced to the contestants.

The competition was a timed event of sixty minutes between three designers. Casey Peck, Konnor Cantrell, Michael Vasquez that were chosen from many applicants that submitted five design pieces to the host DesignProof.  Their mission was to be the one with the best portrait at the end of sixty minutes only being allowed to use one stock photo, three brushes and three fonts. The design program was Adobe CC Design Suite and their computer screens were shared on the main large screen for the audience. During the time there was a series of raffles and trivia questions to keep us engaged with the opportunity to win more prizes. Time passed quickly, a short lull as four judges deliberated before making the final call to determine the winner.  1st Place was won by Konnor Cantrell, @lithium_is_salty who used a mannequin photo, manipulating it into a bright gradient piece that screamed abstract, definitely patterned after the trend for 2018.  The 2nd place spot was delivered to Michael Vasquez, @mikeysart840 for is take on Paco the dog. You can see more of his Aztec style on his attached Instagram page. Casey Peck,  @eyecandydesigns inspired by her apparel and accessory designs that delight women and little girls alike took home the 3rd place prize.

It was a fun event, one that I would definitely attend again. This was only the second competition of what we hope will continue to be an annual event held by DesignProof.  I was intrigued by their desire to inspire not only the artists but the community.  When asked Who Is Design Proof? Their statement is simple, “We are a group of designers, web designers, and digital artists who want to up the creative notch and see talent flourish in California. DesignProof seeks to bring together creatives that have a passion for design, eye for creative expression, and are generally awesome and see what happens.” Why a Tournament? It was their response to this question that made me not only a fan but a supporter, “We want to celebrate the people who make things pretty. They are tinkering, deliberate minds who work late nights lit by little more than the glow of their computer monitor. We look for the best emerging talent and showcase artists and their creative process for the education, excitement and inspiration of an onlooking audience.” More on DesignProof and the Tournament can be read here, http://designproof.org/.

As a creative myself, I love knowing that there are more people out there working hard to help others showcase their best selves and their passions. It is up to all of us to work together to make our community, our world beautiful and live a life inspired that sustains us to be able to continue to create. Please Like, Follow, Share and lets continue to work together to spread beauty in all forms.

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YOU set the Limits

Published by Autumn Brooke on February 23, 2017

Yesterday I shared my first video of myself across social media.  It was meant to be a Live video as that seems to be what is trending, but I could not bring myself to “yet” make that leap.  I, instead, sat alone in my room and recorded a minute long video of myself.  It was simple, I asked people that Follow Autumn Brooke on Facebook to also Follow my Author Page at AutumnBrookeOnline.  However, this simple one minute recording took me all day to work up the courage to film and then at least 30 minutes behind a locked door as I deleted every video I took.  I knew that I was being ridiculous in my critiques and would never be satisfied.  To be honest, I am not even sure that the posted video is because I finally gave up, or the boys were repeatedly knocking on the door with the ever so familiar “Mom, Mom….. are you okay? Why is the door locked? I’m hungry! Mom, my brother hit me!”  It doesn’t matter what made me stop recording; the point was, I did it.  Yes, it took me two days to then work up the nerve to post it, but I did that too and all of it was totally outside of my comfort zone and that is what matters.  You have heard it said that “your life begins outside of your comfort zone” “the magic happens outside of your comfort zone”  ect, ect…..  The list goes on and on and that’s because it is probably true.  Talking on a recording was a big deal for me.  I have tried it many times before, even in a professional atmosphere, but it has yet to get easier, but I continue to try and will keep making that effort.  Why?  Not because the few viewings went viral or made me instantly famous, (which is not my goal) but I do want to be successful enough in my writing and the selling of the novel, and feature film adaptation that I need to put myself out there.  I need to feel comfortable with being on camera or talking about myself.  My favorite place to be is settled on my sofa, in a pair of yoga pants, tank top, and most likely a glass of wine nearby…. but that comfort zone is not going to find me the success that I desire.  I am the only one that makes myself feel nervous, and I am the only one that can tell myself to get up off the couch and reach for the stars.  It is all up to me to make my dreams a reality and achieve my goals.  I know that my story is meant to be told, read, and shared, but that only happens if I make it happen.  I was Active Duty Air Force for a few years in my early 20’s and it really made an impact in who I am today.  One of the most important lessons I took away was how many people told me that I was not Military material or would be able to handle Basic Training, I learned to not only Rise to the Challenge but surpass all expectations, and excel in whatever I do.  I’ve continued to live by that philosophy in all aspects of my life, but am only now realizing that I need to do the same within the boundaries that “I” put on myself.  The future is limitless, and so is your destiny.

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Puddle Play

Published by Autumn Brooke on February 9, 2017

“Life is like a puddle~ you can stand on the edge and watch the reflection of what is…. Or you can jump in and create a wave.”  (Kristine Peterson)

I read this quote and instantly fell in love.  It resonated throughout my whole being as I realized that this was the reason that just last week, I stopped everything and took myself outside with the boys.  There was finally a break in the rain that had left an ocean of puddles.  The boys asked if they could jump in them and I said, “of course”!  An earlier blog mentions how I often allow, encourage, my children to find that childhood joy only found by playing in the puddles.  It was just after 4:30pm on Friday, I poured a glass of wine and sat in the front watching the smiles and listening to their laughter.  The street, busier than usual, as neighbors were driving home from work, grinning and waving as they saw the boys.  I remember wondering how many of them remembered the days they too had played in the rain.

That thought led me to question why we stop seeing the puddle as an opportunity but as an obstacle.  I had recently become this person.  This past week had been more trying then most, filled with a multitude of spirit breaking trials.  (Why there was No Wednesday Blog last week)  Our oven blew a coil and I had to wait a week for a replacement.  Then a valve broke that shut the water off for 48 hours.  Living without was more difficult than I could have ever imagined.  It was one thing after another for so many days that I was ready to blow my own fuse.  Then the benefit of social media let me read a post.  Gratefully not a political rant, but one of blessing, as a Facebook friend was grateful that they had made it home safe to kiss their children after barely avoiding a most likely fatal accident.  I took pause, thinking how my difficult week was not even near the tragedy that others may have faced.

It is important to always remember to count your blessings and be grateful that if there is a puddle as an obstacle on your path, keep moving forward.  If the puddle is too big to step around then use that opportunity to leap in and make a wave.

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John Grisham – #GiveaBook

Published by Autumn Brooke on December 20, 2016

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Grisham says give a book for Christmas.  Yes, that is the John Grisham, the best-selling author of one or more books a year after his first publication in 1989, with A Time to Kill.  Then leading the Best-Seller List of all 1991 with The Firm, that’s 35 books with this year’s newest release, The Whistler, and if that wasn’t impressive enough, 9 of these books were made into major motion pictures.  As an aspiring writer with dreams of reaching the masses with my own feature film adaptation based off my novel, I listen when Grisham speaks, or in this case, I read when he writes.  I’ve always been a fan, but I can admit I started to pay more attention when he ‘Liked’ an Instagram post of mine (I was ecstatic), then to see that he ‘Followed’ me (I was on Cloud Nine.)  It actually encouraged me to buckle down and pay more mind to what I was writing and posting.

I claim my writing as words of heart, mind, and soul.  I don’t stick to one specific theme in my blogs, instead choosing to write by what weighs on my mind.  My voice to the world in an effort to inspire, motivate, and educate.  I hold myself accountable to how what I write may influence others and the fact that these words are forever more a part of history once posted.  It was with this thought that I saw the above image shared on Instagram by Grisham and knew that was ‘it.’  I reached out to the Grisham Team for permission to share his image and was even emailed a better resolution copy.  (I may have danced around my kitchen at such personal acknowledgement.)

Now comes the hard part, to write a blog worthy of sharing his words, with very little to add as Grisham pretty much says it all, “Give a Book for Christmas.”  The 10 listed reasons are more than enough, but for me, I advocate book giving because of the educational benefits.  I’m known for gifting books or gift cards to bookstores; is there really a better gift?  When you give a book as a gift, you are investing in the future.  Promoting an increased knowledge in comprehension skills, spelling ability, and imagination.

Take time to give the best gift of the season, the opportunity to travel the world in multiple time periods or dimensions.  To lose yourself in another life, spawning new career opportunities that may never have been considered had it not been for that one year, that one specific book was placed under the tree.

          Invest in future generations providing promises of unlimited potential, in hope that they dare to dream and realize that nothing is impossible.

 

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Letter to Heaven

Published by Autumn Brooke on May 12, 2016

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This is a different type of blog for me, but after realizing that today was the One Year Anniversary of my blog and that my first post was one for my mother, the following felt appropriate to share…..

A few months ago, I lost a mentor to a long, but courageous, fight to cancer.  Watching her journey was awe inspiring as I had always admired her but now witnessed her strength on a completely different level.  About a week ago her husband made a Facebook post about how he had taken the time to write her a Heavenly Letter as recommended by his grief counselor and how he found it extremely therapeutic.  It struck a chord within me as the anniversary of my mother’s passing was also quickly approaching.  I still have such a wide range of emotions when I think about her that I thought the idea of communicating them through not just words, but a personal letter, might be just the trick to help release some of the pent up grief, frustration, sorrow I feel when it comes to her.  I do not think that there is or should be a time limit to grief, especially as I don’t believe that it ever really ends.  I believe that we just learn how to better cope, and sometimes mask the pain until we can deal with it.  Some days are just going to be better then others and that is okay, as long as we make a point to continue living and find joy again in the world around us.

I am going to share my letter with all of you.  I think it did help a little bit as I enjoyed the feeling of talking to her, but I know that I did not fully vent all of my emotion.  I am sure that I will try the letter thing again, but maybe not anytime soon as it does bring a lot of feelings rushing back.  I’m in the process of learning how to use those vast emotions for good.  I want to help other people know that we are never fully alone, somewhere there is someone feeling just as you feel and that there is Healing within Communication.  We need to reach out and draw strength from one another.  Isn’t that essentially what Facebook and blog posts are…?  A social media site to connect with other likeminded individuals?

Dear Mom,

          This Saturday, 14 May 2016 it will be three years since you left us.  I try not to dwell on how much you are missing here on earth, but that can be easier said than done.  I am often told how you are happier in Heaven but honestly that never makes me feel better.  Actually if I am completely honest, that thought makes me a bit angry.  I don’t want you to be happier in Heaven, I want you to be here with us.  I want to talk to you, I want to see you, and I want you to be there for all the boys’ events and life milestones, no matter if they are big or small.  I hate that you left us so soon, and even more so when I know that I never got the chance to say Goodbye.  Maybe I am being selfish, but I don’t care, I think that in this situation I am allowed to be unreasonable and selfish.  I just want to have you back in my day to day life.  You used to be the first person that I called when I was upset, scared, confused, or happy.  I miss your advice, your jokes, and even your bad days.  I know that things got hard in the end and that I was often frustrated with you.  I am sorry for that, it was really never you, but the circumstances.  I know that you were just as frustrated at being trapped in a body that no longer worked as your mind did and that is my only silver lining in knowing that you are no longer in your earthly body. 

I miss you everyday mom, and I pray that you can are able to see my accomplishments and even my sorrows.  To feel that you are still present in my life and supporting me from Heaven helps.  You were always my biggest cheerleader and fan.  You were the first to teach me the concept of Unconditional Love which is the best gift you gave me in life. 

I love you and hope that I will continue to make you proud as I celebrate your life and honor you by being the very best Me that I can be! 

Forever Your Girl………..

 

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Dream to Reality

Published by Autumn Brooke on March 29, 2016

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Writing a novel has been the biggest accomplishment of my life, besides being the mother of four children.  I would not even mention my children in this post, but I know that if I do not that there will be numerous messages asking how do I not feel fulfilled as a mother or not see that as my life’s biggest accomplishment?  Honestly, being a mother isn’t enough for me and I don’t think that it has to be.  I loved when they were small and my days were so busy from that age old saying, “From Son Up to Son Down.”  Now they are older, they don’t need me in the same manner and that is a good thing.  I have raised strong, independent sons and they will soon move away to be strong, independent men with families of their own.  What of their mother then?  I fear the empty nest syndrome and I do not want to wonder why I failed to live up to my potential as I have always encouraged of my children, so I sat down and committed myself to starting and completing my first novel, Brides Aweigh. 

I have other blog posts where I referenced the book as I was writing it and about two weeks ago, I finished the story.  A historical fiction novel, a genre my mother always told me to write because of my love for history and reference work.  I did enjoy the process, some days more than others.  I am now in the final editing stages and search for publication. 

As would be expected I have a desire to be successful but not only for myself and my children, but because I want the story to be told.  I write because I hope that others can benefit from my words.  In this case I want the rich and fascinating story of the stately Queen Mary to be shared.  I want the world to recognize the incredibly brave journey the British WWII brides made in being reunited with their GI husbands.  Our world would not be as we know it today without these events of the past. 

Yesterday I made an author Facebook page to promote and support all of my writing.  I would appreciate all Like, Follows, and Shares.  https://www.facebook.com/autumnbrookeonline

If you have a dream, Don’t Give Up, Don’t Settle.  It is never too late to fulfill your destiny.  I know the reality of the publishing world and nothing may come of my novel, but at least I reached my first goal.  Now I have a second and I have faith in my dedication and persistence to accomplish all that I put my mind to.  Thank you for all the support my few followers have given me, in bringing my dream to a reality!

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Rainy Days

Published by Autumn Brooke on November 2, 2015

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I woke up to the sound of rain and snuggled further under my covers, reminiscing about the simple pleasure of lazy, rainy, days.  Enjoying the cooler weather, the sound of rain hitting the window panes, curled up with a warm drink, cozy blanket, and a great book or movie.  However that was not to be on my agenda for the day because the boys did not have school and were already beginning to make sounds of boredom and hunger.  Breakfast solved the hunger pains and created a false sense of quiet, that I quickly took advantage of as I made my way to the patio with a cup of coffee to enjoy the much needed rain in the Central Valley.  The tracking device installed in every mother alerting her offspring that she is currently enjoying alone time brought the children outdoors, but I did not mind the interruption of peace as I saw the awe in their face as I granted permission for them to play in the rain.  The youngest ran to tell his older brothers to come jump in the puddles, which they did with such abandonment and delight, I was envious.  Reminded me of days past and the joy in the simple life.  They did not need TV or video games to be occupied, they played for an hour with one another, using their imagination to make up games.  The six year old even mentioned how the rain was good for California because we were in a drought, and how he had missed the rain, serving to restore my faith that he is being well educated.  A few minutes later, however, he came to tell me how the homeless were all able to get free showers today if they had some soap.  All are inside now but still playing well with each other, as I contemplate what soup or stew I should make on this rare rainy day, and thanking God for reminding me that some days we all just need to Dance in the Rain with the innocence of a child.  And just to keep it ‘Real,’ I currently  hear the discussion of what video game should be played happening in the playroom, which means an argument will soon ensue as one or two don’t get their way, and the tattle tales begin with that old faithful call of “Mom….. they won’t let me Play……”

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Social Media

Published by Autumn Brooke on May 13, 2015

In this process of marketing myself so that I can promote my book, I have gone back to the platforms of social media sites long forgotten to breathe new life into updated profiles.  This brings me to ask; What are your favorite, can’t live without, social media sites?  What are the sites that you don’t care about anymore or haven’t even attempted to use?  I can say that there are sites out here that I did not even know existed and I thought myself savvy on at least being “in the know” even if I never tried it.  I know that people tend to use various sites for different reasons, or to connect with different genres, but when are we “too plugged in?”  It is true that with the push of a button you can now post once and connect to multitude of sites simultaneously but to not be viewed as just a poster, never connecting to your followers, it is important to visit the site and read, comment, like, and share.  All of this takes time.  Time that we are not interacting with the real world, with people right in front of us everyday, the little people that see us, hear their stories while typing or reading at our laptops or phones.  I used to be very guilty of this, especially when I was going to school and doing homework.  I am better now, but know that it still happens more often than not, and I know it happens to many of you too.  So today I challenge each of you to take a moment and turn away from the screen and don’t just hear the person in front of you talking, but truly listen to them.  Look at their facial expression as they speak, and if it is one of those little people, see the smile in their eyes as they know you really see them.  Then tell me about it, as you share your favorite or least favorite social media site! Be it #facebook #google+ #instagram #twitter

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